This was a rough year. I lost my mom, my sister had open heart surgery, and my dad went to rehab. I didn't really accomplish any of the goals I set for myself (since I don't even remember what they were), but I survived so that's enough for me. I'm hoping to close the chapter on missing my mom and start the new year remembering her. During the day I'm good at remembering her, it's late at night when I'm laying in bed that I miss her the most. The kids have been asleep for hours and Brad has already started snoring and I can never fall asleep (although I feel chronically fatigued-go figure). My mind starts to wander and I think about all the good mom hugs I can remember from my childhood up until adulthood and my last mom hug. Nothing in this world compares to a mom hug, I think about that every time I hug my babies. It sounds silly but I think about her pretty feet, and the tattoo on her toe-and I miss her pretty feet. I think of random things I miss, a giggle over something I told her the kids did, and I try to picture her in my head. I tell myself I don't have to miss her because she's with me, she'll always be a part of me. I just need to believe it. 

I've decided this year to not set any goals. I just want to love my family and do whatever I need to do to be personally fulfilled-blogging, reading, photography, decorating, gardening, cooking, hopefully exercising :/ , shopping, hanging out with girlfriends. I want to read about the 12 steps, for me and for my dad. I would say I want to an awesome mom, the best wifey and friend anyone could ask for, and try to "have it all" but I know I won't so instead I'll just do my best and take it one day at a time. And try to go to bed earlier........as it is midnight now, yikes! 

We are having a New Years Eve party at our house with our friends as always so crazy pictures to follow.......