Mom

Why did no one ever talk about what happened to you? Why did everyone pretend it was ok? It was always clear to me (from a very young age) you were broken but I didn't know why. I realize now you went through more than any kid should when you were young. It seems so obvious now, how did I not see it before when you were still here and maybe together we could of fixed you. Brought the darkness into the light. Maybe not, but at least I would of truly understood you and had love and compassion. I wish I could give you a hug. I feel your unrest, your tortured soul searching for peace. I don't know if telling your story will bring you peace but I hope so. There have been times after you passed and recently when odd things happen at our house and we can't help but wonder if it's you.

What your Dad did to you no one will ever know for sure. But I've heard stories of what he did to others. I didn't know him, but I have zero fond memorys of him. I feel like i always knew I didnt like him but didnt know why. 

I wish you got to live in this time where victims don't have to be victims. Where you don't have to stay quiet so everyone is comfortable. I have always loved you so and always wondered why you were the way you were. 

Seven years later and I'm still trying to put the pieces together. Somehow I hope if I can put you back together then maybe i can be put back together too. 

A Dream For You

If I could dream
The dream I wanted too,
I would close my eyes,
And dream a dream for you.

I would give you all the world,
That you are deserving of,
And to you I would give
My everlasting love.

I would see to it,
That you were never sad.
And nothing in your life
Would ever happen bad.

I would wish for you,
All things would go your way,
And you would always be happy,
Each and every day.

In my dream
You would stay
Just as beautiful
As you are today.

Life for you would be as perfect
As the blueness of the sky,
And no one would ever hurt you,
Or ever make you cry.

I know it's just a dream,
But if dreams could come true,
I would close my eyes,
And dream a dream for you.