Praying for a miracle in 2015

Two things breaking my heart going into the new year, Holly Weller and Kelly Miller. Both young, my age, battling cancer and have small babies. Really nothing worse in the world. To think you might not be there for your babies as they grow up, and for a child to lose their mom are realities just too cruel and unimaginable to be possible. I would give up years of my life and give them to these ladies if I could. Praying for a miracle that they can survive another year. 

So my only new years resolution is to remember everyday to hold and love my babies, my husband, my family, my friends.

If your up for some tear jerking this is Holly's latest entry-

http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/hollyweller/journal/view/id/549cec24ca16b4681ca3e895

Kelly Miller is someone I graduated high school with and lives in Washougal. She had breast cancer that she has been battling for years and now it has metastasized to her brain. Her kids are the same age as mine, I'm just so sad for her it's hard to breathe. I'm stalking her facebook page and praying for a miracle.

We had a very merry Christmas

Hanging out with family on Christmas eve.
Abi and Sonja

Waking up Christmas morning

Santa left Abi and Ben each a Kindle Fire, they must of been really good! We opened some presents Christmas eve since I had to work on Christmas day (how dare!). First Christmas I've had to work since the kids were born so I can't complain. That's just life when you work in a hospital.

Christmas dinner at our cousins

Papa and the kiddos

Then we spent the rest of the weekend in Chelan with the rest of the fam. Wine tasting, bowling, eating yummy food.

Cute Cate

Gram and Abi

Two papas!

Only picture of me, I lost a contact and hadn't showered-perf! :)

It was beautiful. And cold.

So so thankful to have such a wonderful holiday surrounded by family and it was Cate's first Christmas! We were super spoiled but at least we are super appreciative. A friend said the other day- "I wish I could eat frosted cookies for breakfast and spend money like it's endless everyday, but back to reality it is" -so ture! :)

Caty bear is 4 months old!

She started belly laughing this week. There is nothing better than hearing a baby laugh. Ben is the only one that can get her going. I like to call her my little skittle because she's so sweet and precious I could just eat her up.

And a few Christmas pictures, tis the season!

December 16th

The month of December reminds me of so many things- Christmas decorations, dark rainy nights, homemade butter toffee, holiday shopping, the smell of a fresh cut tree, crazy Christmas eve parties at my parents house, being with family, my Mom's birthday (December 16th). I miss my mom. More than anything I just miss hanging out with my mom. She'd come up and help me with the kids if Brad was away for the weekend. We'd hang out and play with the kids, make dinner, laugh. Just totally normal everyday stuff. She would do anything for the kids and I. She'd go all day until she was exhausted to make our lives easier, buy us way more stuff than we need, pamper us, love us. We had our moments but 99% of time was just normal everyday picture perfect stuff. I miss that. I realized the other day Abi has almost lived longer without her silly grandma than she did with her. Ben doesn't even remember her since he was only one. Almost three whole years have passed and so much has changed, the kids were just babies and Cate wasn't even close to being on the radar. If only she could see them now, if only she could meet Cate and hold her. Not as her disabled, blind, post-stroke self, but in her pre-surgery state. That would be amazing. She's missing out on chubby baby thighs and melt your heart gummy smiles, Abi's sweet hugs, and Ben's kisses. That's what's so sad for me, everything she's missing and all the love the kids are missing and I'm missing not having us all together. Your mom is Christmas is morning, and it's true. Your mom is comfort, and I miss that comfort so much. Happy birthday in heaven mom, hope you have a fabulous day with Gram and Kathy. Love and miss you so much.

    

To my sweet Grandma

Today would have been my Grandma Connie's 99th birthday (I believe). I miss her so. I miss her little wrinkly face, her kind words, her sweetness. She was always there, like a second mother. I hope I can carry a little bit of her with me always and pass that little something to my babies. I miss all these ladies, and love you sis! :)

A very Christmas weekend

Got the tree decorated, house decorated, lights up outside, did some Christmas shopping, Christmas cards ordered, so you can say we had a very Christmas weekend.

Cate's stocking that Grandma made, sooooo cute!

Spoiler alert, there may or may not be some Christmas card pictures here.

The cutest feet I know.

Sweet baby feet

Our Elf, Rudy, has been busy causing trouble. He toilet papered our tree, put underwear in our stockings, drew on the chalk board, got into the cereal, and built himself a fort out of blocks. What will he do next? (good thing Pinterest has a billion ideas)

Ended the weekend with homemade french onion soup the husband made, I told you he's pretty awesome :)