This was a rough year. I lost my mom, my sister had open heart surgery, and my dad went to rehab. I didn't really accomplish any of the goals I set for myself (since I don't even remember what they were), but I survived so that's enough for me. I'm hoping to close the chapter on missing my mom and start the new year remembering her. During the day I'm good at remembering her, it's late at night when I'm laying in bed that I miss her the most. The kids have been asleep for hours and Brad has already started snoring and I can never fall asleep (although I feel chronically fatigued-go figure). My mind starts to wander and I think about all the good mom hugs I can remember from my childhood up until adulthood and my last mom hug. Nothing in this world compares to a mom hug, I think about that every time I hug my babies. It sounds silly but I think about her pretty feet, and the tattoo on her toe-and I miss her pretty feet. I think of random things I miss, a giggle over something I told her the kids did, and I try to picture her in my head. I tell myself I don't have to miss her because she's with me, she'll always be a part of me. I just need to believe it. 

I've decided this year to not set any goals. I just want to love my family and do whatever I need to do to be personally fulfilled-blogging, reading, photography, decorating, gardening, cooking, hopefully exercising :/ , shopping, hanging out with girlfriends. I want to read about the 12 steps, for me and for my dad. I would say I want to an awesome mom, the best wifey and friend anyone could ask for, and try to "have it all" but I know I won't so instead I'll just do my best and take it one day at a time. And try to go to bed earlier........as it is midnight now, yikes! 

We are having a New Years Eve party at our house with our friends as always so crazy pictures to follow.......

I forgot to mention the best day after Christmas miracle. My work called and said the hospital was slow and I didn't need to come in so the kids and I laid down (together in my bed) and took a two and half hour nap. It was beyond magical...... and will probably never happen again.

My book- isn't it pretty!? It's fun to read posts from two years ago, so many things that I forgot about.

Christmas 2012

Christmas time is family time and the kiddos were super excited to hang out with both Papa's. It was fun as always to have my sister and family come visit too. We were way too spoiled on Christmas, and sickly as usual. It will take days to recover from all the excitement, food, and fun. Ben was a present opening expert this year and was excited about everything he got. Abi loved opening presents but was shy with all the attention on her. They are happy campers and have been playing non-stop with their new toys. I got an awesome present from the husband, he had this blog published into a book, so now apparently I'm an author. It's nice because I hate printing pictures and putting them into an album, so it serves as a baby book, life/family book. It is really pretty sweet, our life documented in hard back with pictures I took in my words, I love.

 

I meant to post this before Christmas, from Abi's school, kinda cute....

Santa’s Prayer on Christmas Eve

By Warren Jennings

...

The sleigh was all packed, the reindeer were fed

But Santa still knelt by the side of his bed.

“Dear Father,” he prayed “Be with me tonight. There’s so much to do and my schedule is tight. I must jump in my sleigh and streak through the sky,

Knowing full well that my reindeer can fly.

I will visit each household before the first light,

I’ll cover the world and all in one night.

With sleigh bells a-ringing, I’ll land on each roof,

Amid the soft clatter of each little hoof.

To get in the house is the difficult part, So I’ll slide down the chimney of each child’s heart. My sack will hold toys to grant all their wishes,

The supply will be endless like the loaves and the fishes.

I will fill all the stockings and not leave a track,

I’ll eat every cookie that is left for my snack.

I can do all these things, Lord, only through You!

I just need your blessing, then it’s easy to do.

All this to honor the birth of the ONE,

That was sent to redeem us, Your most Holy Son.

So, to all of my friends, least Your glory I rob,

Please Lord, remind them who gave me this job.”

 

Christmas morning

 

Cinderella doll from Papa Marc was a hit.

At Nana's for Christmas dinner

 

Little buddy was not very excited about getting his picture taken this year, the best I could do.

 

Kid Adventure Zone

Fun way to spend Christmas eve with adorable Cousin Evie.

Abi's first Nutcracker ballet

It was Grandma Vicki's and Aunt Keri's first Nutcracker ballet too. It was a fun girls outing and Abi did really good, she just got a little wiggly by the end.

 

Grandma Vicki got Abi a special ornament.

Abi had a Christmas tea party at her friend Jada's house and we made a fruit tree. I saw it on Pinterest and it turned out pretty cute.

I got a picture of Abi after we got home, Ben looked adorable too in a pink polo shirt but he was too tired for pictures and had to go straight down for a nap.

It's a done deal when the time comes for us to give up on getting a real Christmas tree, I want a flocked one. It looks fake anyway so why not go the extra mile. LOVE! 

 I also need a fun tree to hang all our silly ornaments. Yes please.